New Era

Wednesday 6^th July 2011

I was so tired after the hectic day yesterday that I slept like a log.  My eldest woke me early this morning to inform me that the cat was stuck on the loft roof.  A clothes prop and skipping rope later I was fishing for cat out of my bedroom window.

After a few more conversations with my husband I had a chat with a Midwife on the telephone.  She was very helpful and I now have more information to work with to move forward with this pregnancy.  It is very early days yet, approx. 5 weeks but even still, it’s scary and exciting.  It’s a new life that has formed and I cannot wait.

My Mother-in-law thought we were joking when we told her on the phone this evening.  She had her concerns regarding my health but was wholly supportive of our decision.  I spoke to my own Mum who seemed supportive but still had to ask if it was the right decision for me.  I was still quite upset by this.  It does lead me to wonder if my sister had the same conversations with Mum or whether they treated her differently.  I do need to stop worrying about how she is being treated compared to me but I would like some emotion other than anger or worry directed at me at some point in the future.

My mother is making me feel like I am disappointing her, she tried to change my mind again by pointing out all the bad things about becoming a parent again.  I love her deeply and do respect her fears for my health but I long to have that motherly support and approval which I seem to rarely get.  Even with my studies I feel that only my husband respects just how much hard work I put in these days.

We also told the children today.  Truthfully I would have preferred to wait until I was out of the danger stages but the children do jump on me and quite often on my stomach.  They also  treat me like a slave and usually demand something there and then with no room for negotiation if I’ve just sat down.  In order to get them to understand just how tired I am and how I need to take it easy, telling them about the baby was the only option.  They all seem thrilled and the younger two are already falling out over who will do the feeds at 2am.  I’m not sure that idea will last long.