Monday, 11 July 2011

Sleepy Hollow

I’m being honest when I say the last few days have been tiring.  I have even found it hard to write about anything and feel that I want to blame being tired and emotional but ultimately feel that it is down to sheer bone idleness.  After having three successful pregnancies you would think that I know what to expect, what to look out for and what to avoid but forgive me because it all feels new to me.  I guess I suffer from selective memory loss along with the selective hearing that comes naturally to parents as it does to children. 
I seem to get done what I want to absolutely need to do and then just sit in a daze like a hollow shell until it’s time to pick the children up again.  Just the other day I commented how I’d never felt such tiredness during pregnancy but the more I think about it the more I remember how much I slept during all three pregnancies.  Having my eldest at the age of 16 was quite easy looking back, I was at the age where I could laze in bed of an evening without having to think of chores and other children.  Carrying the other two was different, I worked full time and travelled with work too.  The housework suffered, the homemade evening meals became ‘ding ding’ meals and my evenings became snooze time on the sofa. 
Last night I think I was asleep by 10pm which for me is extremely early.  I say ‘I think’ because I really don’t recall what time I was doing anything to have an idea of what time I may have nodded off.  I awoke at 6:30am under my fluffy pink blanket with a note saying ‘sorry but I tried to wake you’.  I felt so guilty and yet had slept amazingly well.  During breakfast I was doing the usual moaning about how tired I was when my Husband interrupted to comment that anyone would think I was nine months pregnant because of the way I was talking.  Initially I laughed at his remark but as the day has passed it has played on my mind a lot. 
It’s nothing to cause an argument over but do men actually realise just what our bodies are going through during early pregnancy?  Maybe it’s just my husband hoping to ignore the symptoms I’ve been moaning about.  Let’s face it, showing him my sore boobs over the breakfast must be a turn off for any guy.  The more I’ve thought about his comment, the more it has reminded me of similar comments with him twice before, both times when pregnant with the two younger children.  Maybe I need to sit and have a chat with him, again I don’t wish to cause an argument but I want him to realise just how wiped out I am feeling at the moment.  I really don’t want to be in that position again like six years ago where the day I gave birth to my daughter I cried to my Mum on the phone because he hadn’t offered me a cup of tea since we got home.
I also laughed about a remark he made during my last pregnancy the day after I discovered that I was with child.  He was wondering how I could be all of a sudden tired, feeling bloated and having back ache.  He had a fair point and to be honest after breeding what feels like a football team I now feel equipped with the knowledge to answer him.  It isn’t all of a sudden and he’s right.  What does happen, in my opinion at least, is that the symptoms, especially tiredness, is there all along but because we then discover that our bodies are now incubators and changes are happening our senses are more aware so we notice things more.  It is also a lot easier to admit that we are tired when pregnant and haven’t actually got of our backsides all day.  Notice how I’m saying our, I sure hope others are like this, if not I really am just a lazy person.  I just hope this feeling passes soon, my to-do list is growing daily and the summer holidays are growing nearer.

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